Bodybuilding Transformation Challenge Weeks 6-8 of 12

These last three weeks I was really hoping I'd see a bigger change than I have. I've stayed at pretty much the same body weight, with maybe some minor physique changes. This would be fine during a normal cut, but I have to put my head back into the game and drive it a little bit harder if I'm going to be in the running against people who are loads better at dieting and are starting off with a better foundation in bodybuilding (as well as those with great genetics, but I won't worry about things not under my control).

Progress shot at 7 weeks.

The hardest thing for me to have done and to have overcome in these last several weeks was simply to diet moderately. I've always crash dieted consecutively, almost religiously for a very long time, and it has always helped me get to where I've needed or wanted to be. To me it's almost a reflex. To lose weight, stop eating anything other than protein and green veggies. Sure, it's fantastic if you don't care about strength or having any energy to function, but it's unsustainable and the weight will always come back on once you go back to eating normally. High protein and low everything else is not normal and will not be sustainable long term, but moderate dieting is sustainable for life. It's a skill I never thought I'd get good at, but I'm very proud to say that if anything, these last two months have shown me that I'm able to be truly flexible with my diet, while still getting to my goals, however slowly that may be.

I came from the mindset that everything must be counted in order to "fit" your macros properly. I used to weigh the 2g onion in my salad, the splash of almond milk, even my damn hot sauce if I knew it had even a single carb. What ended up happening was I stopped eating salads and started eating pre-packaged, sodium loaded, unhealthy foods. Why? Because it's a damn pain in the ass to chop a salad and weigh the ingredients individually, find the right ingredients in MFP, put in the right equation to get the exact amount of what you put in it when you're starving and busy. And if someone took a bite of my food? I would panic. Legitimately PANIC. Where did the macros go? How many was that? What should I eat to make it up? DAMMIT I spent 45 minutes perfecting my meal with those exact macros and someone had the nerve to taste it???

Yep, that neurotic.

Protein bread, olive oil mayo, deli meats, & lite salami.

15F / 21C / 45P ~ 400 kcal

Never again. If I don't want to eat the remainder of my food, I get rid of it or save it for later. If I eat it later, I approximate the macros. If I want a bite of something, I'll have it. Sometimes I'll leave 100 calories of cushion for these little mishaps, sometimes I won't. But you know what I will never do? I will never break into an anxious sweat over someone tasting my food or wanting me to taste theirs. I will never sacrifice my healthy, delicious salads for bland, unhealthy frozen meals due to laziness. I will never succumb to uncontrollable binge-eating driven by stress levels over food. What I will do is chill out, weigh my meals during meal prep once a week, and improvise along the way. If I'm feeling stressed or anxious, being a neurotic counter won't help.

Overall, the mental gains these two months have been totally worth it. I haven't binged, or even thought about binging for a long, long time. And I have flexible dieting to thank for that. Flexible meaning, my diet can be whatever the hell I need it to be, in order to live a healthy and fulfilling life without stressing over something as trivial as food.

We have four more weeks in this transformation challenge, time to get things in gear.

Until next time,
Mel